Tuesday, August 13, 2013

Dinner Invitation

Mashed Potatoes
courtesy photobucket.com

A newly married couple were new members to our church, so we invited them over after church to have dinner with us.  We were newly weds ourselves, so it was good to have friends with similar lots in life.

All was going well, and dinner was served, fried chicken, mashed potatoes, gravy, green beans and French bread.

Free clip art
My hand potato masher had done its usual fairly good job at pulverizing the potatoes. 

As we began to enjoy our meal, my husband made a comment about the potatoes being a bit lumpy.  Silence fell and all was quiet, including me. 

Then my hubby changed the subject and the remainder of the afternoon went smoothly.

The next day my friend mentioned that when they got home, her husband asked her, “Did you notice how nice Hazel was,  when her husband complained about the potatoes.  She was very quiet and did not talk back?  So why can’t you be more like her?”

What I told her next was, “You should have heard what I said to him after you all left.  I asked him to please not criticize me in front of company, but to wait until they leave to have his say.”

That calmed my friend down, because she was under the impression that I must be a saint which was far from the truth at that time.  (Sainthood came later in life.) :-)

That evening I rehearsed to my husband what my girl friend and I had talked about, and together we pledged not to criticize or tear down each other in public, or to others when we were not present.

Through the years, we have observed some couples who have a habit of making fun of each other, and they say snide hurtful and cutting remarks in front of others.  We wondered how they spoke to each other in the privacy of their homes.

Then we have also observed other couples holding hands in public, and lovingly calling each other by appropriate pet names.

Let your words be sweet and kind to those you love and care about.  Never embarrass them anywhere or play cruel jokes on them.

May I suggest? 
Have someone over for dinner and please assign the husband to mash the potatoes.

Linking with Jen at: Soli Deo Gloria
Sharing with Rosilind in Croatia, at Wednesday R and R  


  1. Isn't it wonderful to have a wife who is over eighty and can still remember every detail of something that happen sixty years ago!

  2. Hi hi. Nice reminder for young couples:)
    Have a nice day Hazel!

  3. My wife and I both have been guilty of this and it's easy to do with all the distractions and frustrations of life. Like all things, we have to establish good habits... but we all need a little reminder... besides, I can't make mashed potatoes!

  4. Just this past weekend I heard a fellow christian make a very mean comment about his spouse- he laughed and thought it was a great joke. I looked at my husband to gauge his take and could tell he was uncomfortable too.
    Later I asked my husband if he thought it was funny but didn't want to laugh because I was there. He said he didn't find it funny and that he couldn't understand why people marry if they don't want to spend time with their spouses.

    We don't have a perfect marriage, but I'm glad we aren't like that couple. My heart goes out to them as I lift them up in prayer and ask God to guard my own marriage from such attitudes.

  5. That's a great story. I love that not only was there honest conversation between you and your husband about the criticism but that both of you committed to kindness. I love this example of how we can be intentional when we make a mistake to do better instead of being defensive and angry!

  6. Good post and reminder, Hazel. I try to live out Eph. 4:29 - to not let any unwholesome words come out of my mouth - especially with my wife. Using our words properly is so important. Thanks for this.

  7. So enjoyed - thank you Hazel - and Thank you too for your comments - God bless you.

  8. Awesome post Hazel! Hubby and I agreed very early in our marriage that we would live by the rules you've shared. That resulted in us being the hand-holding couple!

  9. What a lovely thing to do to invite newlyweds over for dinner and what a feast you prepared! This just isn't done anymore. You handled the situation so well. Married couples need to treat one another the way they would a treasured friend, because isn't that what they are--friends?

  10. This was great, Hazel! I really enjoyed the story, and your advice is very wise. I also have seen couples who seem to have nothing good to say to each other, and make cutting remarks in front of others. Not a good situation at all.

    Might I just add that we (ME) need to careful how and what we say to our spouses in private, too!!

    Congrats on your sainthood - LOL!!!



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